"What Are They Called?"

It's September again. Another birthday for me, and another anniversary of 9/11. September used to be such a wonderful month. There was the excitement of kids going back to school. There were first football games of the season, and sometimes the first touch of fall in the air. It was a month to inspire songwriters to pen lyrics about love and enchantment. But not anymore.

Now September is a time for reflection and memories. It is a time to honor those who died on September eleventh, two thousand and one. It is a time for memorial services, and a time to watch for the nine millionth time those two planes plunging into the twin towers.

Every time I see those planes make their circling turns and then crash into the buildings I think to myself that I forgot to remember to forget. I always plan to turn away from the screen and not watch that horror again. I just don't want to feel the pain those scenes engender. I don't want to forget what happened but I want to remember to forget the pain of that sight.

This year the memorial in New York City focused on the parents of those who died. Did your heart break for them as mine did? I don't think there could be anything worse than losing a child. As someone once said kids are not supposed to die before their parents. That is just not the natural scheme of things.

Someone mentioned to me too that parents who have lost their children do not have a term applied to them. Children who lose their parents are called orphans. Men who lose their wives are called widowers. Women who lose their husbands are called widows. But what do you call a parent who has lost his/her child? There is no name. Maybe because that is such a horrible condition that no name can be applied.

It dawned on me this year that I am an orphan. I have lost both my parents and that buffer they provided between me and death is gone. I always felt they would die before I did so as long as they were alive I had an event that was keeping my life secure. Now it is gone. There is no generation of Coopers standing between eternity and me.

I am sure the parents of those who lost children on 9/11 felt that were a buffer between them and the grave, but they were wrong. The terrorists robbed them of that role. And now they stand as sentinels of grief, in a category of suffering souls that have no name.

 

 

 

 

 

©2004 Jackie K. Cooper

Click above to find out more about Jackie's books!