|
Jason Momosa in "Conan the Barbarian"
courtesy of Lionsgate
|
“Conan the Barbarian” (Lionsgate)
Miss Me Yet? – Arnold
In 1982 Arnold Schwarzenegger appeared on the screen as “Conan the Barbarian.” With his halting English
and his massive muscles Arnold made a pretty convincing barbarian. There was also something about his
mood and his manner that drew audiences into the theaters. It wasn’t his biggest hit movie but it did
give an impressive start to his career. Now twenty-nine years later we have a new version of “Conan the
Barbarian” and the question is why.
Was the world clamoring for an updated “Barbarian” movie? I don’t think so. Maybe it just looked like
something that could be done fairly cheaply and would bring in some bucks. So now we have Jason Momoa
stepping into Arnold’s boots and wielding a mighty sword as the 2011 version of Conan. He has the
muscles but he doesn’t have the charisma of Arnold.
The story is basically one of revenge. Conan’s father (Ron Perlman) is killed by Khalar Zym (Stephen
Lang). Conan swears that he will hunt him down and kill him, and also his evil daughter Marique (Rose
McGowan). It takes him a few years to find them but eventually he comes forward to do battle with
them.
Along the way he has taken up with a woman named Tamara (Rachel Nichols). She is of a pure blood line
that Zym needs to bring his wife back from the dead. Don’t ask how – that all is a bit too complicated.
So Zym is after Tamara and Conan is after Zym. Each one has his own agenda.
Momoa is fine in the muscle department but his acting skills are a little shaky. He does manage to
speak in a guttural tone which makes his barbarian creds okay. As for Nichols well she is pure American
and seems a little out of place in this saga set on foreign soil. Every time she opens her mouth she
verifies she doesn’t belong in this cast.
The movie does not dwell on its plot; it dwells on its depiction of Conan as a killing machine. He
slices and dices everyone with whom he comes in contact. Heads are lopped off and necks are severed,
arms and legs fall by the wayside and blood spurts by the gallons. It’s the Conan way.
The film is rated R for profanity, nudity and violence.
Momoa is no Schwarzenegger and this “Conan the Barbarian” is not the equal to Arnold’s. Still if you
just want blood and guts you will not be disappointed.
I scored “Conan the Barbarian” a slashed 5 out of 10. |
|
Official Website |
|
|
|
